
Inside …. A Poem By Wildfire
Reflected in the glass
A shadow on the wall
One I thought I knew
But she’s not me at all
The “me” I’m familiar with
That I’ve grown accustomed to
Has been living a lie
Hasn’t been telling the truth
Deep, deep in those veins
Underneath that skin
Something unpleasant
The “evil” within
It moves when I move
It goes where I go
It’s always been there
How could I not know?
I wish I had seen
That there’d been a sign
This body I’d cared for
It was no longer mine
Do you ever know yourself?
Who you are deep inside?
I wish I had known
Now I wait for the tide
The water comes in
Washes over like a flood
I don’t like what I am
But can’t change what’s in my blood

Shar Schmidt. Health insurance advisor. Diagnosed at 35. IDC, Stage III, Triple Negative, BRCA1. Mom to one little wild child, wife, daughter, sister, friend. Shar has no family history of cancer; she’s the first on both sides of her family to be diagnosed.
Editor’s Note: This piece has been republished with permission from WILDFIRE Magazine, the “GENETICS” issue (Vol 4, No 1, Copyright (c) February 2019 by Wildfire Community LLC). More information available at wildfirecommunity.org
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WILDFIRE Magazine is the only magazine for young women survivors and fighters of breast cancer under 45 years old. Headquartered in Santa Cruz, California, WILDFIRE is a beautiful, story-based bi-monthly magazine published on different themes relevant to young women survivors, from stage 0 to stage IV. Beautiful and ad-free! Visit wildfirecommunity.org for more info.